No Office for Single Women

You figure it had to happen.

It's been a minute since I've mentioned Mr. Casablanca. Well, this week, he came roaring back into my life, but not my bed. Not by a longshot. The last couple of weeks, I had been working on forgetting the chap. I was listening to best friend Amber's advice. She said that if he was as smart as he sounds, he wouldn't touch a working romance with a ten foot pole. I tended to see her point. She said, just wait till his project was over and on his last day in the building, ask him out. If he says yes, the better. If he says no, I'd be no worse off. I saw the wisdom in BF's words, so I was meditating myself into celibacy and dealing with seeing hotness on a regular basis without being able to touch. And then. And then...

I'm working with my two gals - Tall Gal and Skinny Gal at our other building and TG breathlessly announces that she has gossip. Did she say gossip? We love gossip. We adore gossip. We eat gossip for late afternoon snacks! Of course I want to hear gossip. Give it to me!

And then she added, "it's about SG's MySpace page!"

Oh no. I bet somebody has threatened her again on her page. An ex-girlfriend of a plantonic friend has the idea that SG is/was/will screw(ing) him. Total nonsense, but hey, crazy people thrive on nonsense, right? SG had to file a police report after the crazy bitch's brother left a message on the page that he'd kill her. See, this is why I will never have a MySpace page. Ever. I'm convinced that in this day in age, how you get stalked or threatened is via MySpace. SG put her page on private in response and here the gossip and lil' Ndel converge.

I asked SG if it was the crazy bitch... TG interjects, "sorry, girlie, MC likes the skinny one; he wanted to see her page."

Okay, after I quickly picked up my heart that had jumped out of my chest, I looked SG gal in the face and said, "I thought that might be the case. He's a great guy. Like I told you, you should go for it."

SG, to her credit, said, "naw. I can't go out with a guy who's never even talked to me! He didn't even say anything."

Then, I had to regroup. She's right. He doesn't talk to her. He hasn't talked to her - outside of hello and goodbye. What did she mean he didn't say anything? I didn't really know how the whole MySpace thing works, but I knew her page was on private. So, he requested to be her friend, but apparently, without writing an accompanying note. You ask how did he know about her page? Well, Joe, MC's supervisor, had been telling the crew that SG had a "racy" page. Now, she doesn't, but Joe's going through a mid-life crisis and SG is the girl in roses, a la American Beauty. So... Man talk.
I was torn between not hyperventilating and figuring out if TG was full of shit and had overstated the situation. We talked a bit more about how requests are made through MySpace. Once it came out that he said nothing whatsover, not even, "hey, it's MC..." and she didn't recogonize him right away, I felt my breath come a bit easier. TG fluttered around, as she's apt to do. SG and I talked easily. This is because I told her a few weeks ago that if he was actually interested in her, I'd be happy for her. Why would I say that? Mostly because I think he's a good guy. Such a good guy, in fact, that I would be happier to see him with someone I know. Yeah sure I was softening the blow so to speak. And what of it? When you have skinnier, younger competition around you every day.... I don't care how self-assured you are, the idea that he could be attracted to another flava has to cross your mind. Hell, he's a grown-ass man and heck if I know what he'll do. I was just preparing myself for a possibility. I'll be damned if it did, in fact, protect me from my own self doubt.

I mean, I saw him that morning although he didn't know it. He was looking very intently and seemed to be fighting the urge to come over. I stayed right where I was. I was trying to wean myself from the man. I had to stand my ground. In a weird way, I was so glad that I did. Somehow my holding back gave me comfort. The rest of the afternoon, I silently prepared myself to eventually see SG & MC together - maybe. I began to be okay with it. Not good with it, mind you, just okay.

And then my cell phone rang. Right back on schedule for our after hours catch up calls that had been AWOL for over a week. He asked me if I was talking to Bruce Willis earlier. I told him he had a nice MySpace page. He laughed. He said Joe said it was racy. He was expecting naked pictures or something, but it was just a regular MySpace page (with threats, no doubt). We laughed. I couldn't resist sticking my head out of my office, pointing to my cellphone surgically attached to my ear. It was him, I mouthed. When I hung up, I strolled outside, leaned on SG's cubicle and beamed.

"Who was that?" TG asked.

"You call him?"


I'd call it a draw.


It still won't hurt to ask him out when he's done with his project. Even if nothing comes of it, at least you'll know you gave it a shot.

And me, personally, I wouldn't want to see someone I like(d) with someone I know. I'm just not that good.

My best friend is trying to hook me up with a guy who liked her (but she is married, so it wouldn't have worked out.) I don't know how I feel about it. Well, at first, I was like, "if he's attracted to you/your type (skinny white girls who looks like pixies) then he can't be attracted to girls like me (Black girl with thick thighs.)

But I don't like to discount any man who has my best friend's seal of approval. So, we're emailing each other right now - we're geographically undesirable to each other anyway. But he is cute and a hopeless romantic and tall. So, we'll see.

But I'm moving to Africa in the fall and I'm not trying to fall in love!!
Ndelible said…
RHG ~~

Oh, make no mistake. I'm gonna ask him out at the end of the project, barring knowing he's actively dating anyone. And I'm not good at all. I'm just a realist. I figure if he's into someone else he can't be right for me, no matter how much it hurts. Of course I wouldn't be thrilled if he dated SG or TG (she's got a thing for him too -- woe is me). But I'm their boss first, not a scorned woman, so I'd be supportive, if not sticking pins in a voodoo dolls made in their images... LOL

Wow, BFs trying to hook you up is almost always a good thing. Sometimes family gets it right, but BFs almost always get it right! Moving to Africa??? What is that about? My godsister moved to Africa last summer. Is everybody cool moving to Africa?

MC is locally geographically undesirable to me too, but Africa... But, you never know... It could be destiny! Good luck!
I'm joining the Peace Corps. Fella knows this and hasn't stopped talking to me. He's even suggested meeting when he visits a friend in my area. So, we'll see.

If he's the one, he'll wait for me to fulfill a dream I've had for a long time and come back. If not, I already know he'll be a great friend.
Lovebabz said…
Oh this is heady stuff. Hey do what you feel is best. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. But just know you are an amazing woman and the universe is already working to send you the best mate for you. Maybe it's this guy, maybe not. I do know that when the stars are perfectly aligned for you, it won't be this complicated.
Ndelible said…
RHG ~~

Congratulations! Hey, he sounds like a great guy. I'd give him a chance. Either way, sounds like you have the right attitude.


I don't know if it's complicated - MC has almost nothing to do with it. Regardless, if it's right, it's right, I will let destiny decide. In the meantime, I can dream!!!!!
Lovebabz said…

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